Follow
Share

My mom is 80 and is his main caregiver. However, she has ailments of her own. I have two siblings. We all work but, have decent jobs, but are not rich by any means. Our money goes to pay bills and take care of our own families. We do help our parents with what we have left over. My father only receives $1800 a month from a pension. He doesn't get social security benefits because when he was a postal worker they did not pay into social security. My mom never worked so she doesn't get social security benefits. We can't afford a health aide or a elder care home for my dad. He has dementia and hallucinations due to his Parkinson's and my mom is at her wit's end. The Parkinson's foundations out there don't assist at all. They only fundraise. I've called various senior organizations and they lead to the same place, Medicaid. They were denied Medicaid. I truly don't understand these government agencies. Thank you all for listening.

My Dad is 86. Mom too. Je has advanced parkinsons. Mom qualified for social security as his spouse. Between them less than your parents. Social security pays for Medicare. Both live with me and we are spending down their life's savings to pay. When that runs out medicaid can kick in. Supposedly you can get palliative thru medicare which might cover someo e to bathe. We have been unable to get that to materialize but we do have an Occupational therapist, speech and pt thru plan a after every hospitalization which can be followed with rehab. Mom is now wheelchair bound so we've gone from 4 hors per day weekdays to 8 hours so I can work. I do the care when I get home after work including bathing meds and feeding. He takes meds six timrd per day. Start at six am to feed h I m meds. Go to work. 90 min commute each way. Caregiver arrives 8:30. They leave anywhere between 4pm and 8pm depending on my work schedule. Only other option is to do hospice. That has consequences that might not be good and tiu need someone to say he has six months. Quite frankly I've decided after 5 hospital stays and four rehab stays that they are better off with me. The shortage of staff at both hospitals and rehab jas led to life threatening medication errors and omissions which have been more stressful for mom and me. I might add that in spite of being rehab and hospitals they always are in worse shape coming home because they are confined to their beds more than at home. Your mom has my respect and admiration because it is harder than raising kids. I have decided that if they could spend 28 years raising me and helping with the kids the least I can do is spend some years helping them. Some people rotate the elders between kids to share the burden but that may not ne possible for various reasons. Nobody asks for Parkinsons but being stuck in that body which is slow and does not respond is depressing and miserable. Hang in there and let me know if you have specific questions. I've made some modifications that have made a huge difference and fostered more independence even if supervised...both for my sake, my moms and his. If he has hallucinations his levodopa dose may be off. This happens to him as well when meds are missed or forgotten. You need to work with a movement disorder specialist to adjust this as this is critical. We give him 10mg of melatonin at night 9pm so he sleeps thru most of it. He is much better mentally when he sleeps properly and meds are on time and dosed right. Catheter at night reduces the burden and covered by Med B.
(0)
Report

This is almost certainly something to do with the married status, with the wife having no reported income, etc.
You are correct. You need to have the reasoning. And you need AN ATTORNEY to help you figure out what the problem is here.
Trust me, with no assets and an income of only under 2,000 a month for two people? And if he is ILL ENOUGH to qualify? There's no way he won't get Medicaid coverage. Now as to what THEY cover for in home care? Not much. But he would get in facility care in a Medicaid qualifying LTC.
Let us know more when you get the letter.
As said, they always say WHY the person doesn't qualify. You go from there. And you may need to go with an expert. Sadly that means an attorney most often.
(1)
Report

My mom and dad do have Medicare. However, as we all know, Medicare is not that great when it comes to health aides or living facilities.
(2)
Report

I actually have not seen the letter. My brother is supposed to scan it over to me, and he hasn't yet. My father does not have any assets at all. I'm being 100% honest, no assets. He doesn't own a home, a car. He does have a little bit of savings in the bank. That is all.
(1)
Report

What is the reasoning for the denial? It always says on the letters that he received. It may be because he has to many assets. I have worked the system for several people. He should be able to get LONG TERM care. They don’t tell you about this program. It’s a merge between Medicare and Medicaid
(1)
Report

Time to see an attorney, because I don't understand just WHY he isn't qualifying, and you don't say. This is going to require division of finances I would imagine. If you father and his pension goes into a care facility it leaves your mother destitute.

You need good guidance here. While I do not believe children should pay for parents care I do believe that you should get together and raise money for an elder law attorney to see what the problem is here, because there IS one.
(1)
Report

Start a Discussion
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter