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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
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V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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I would let her keep talking to the picture if it gives her some kind of comfort. I'm just curious. Is it bothering you that she does this? I'm guessing yes since you asked. Why does it bother you? I'm not asking this in a critical way. Just want to know more about the situation.
It's bothersome to watch our mother's acting odd and out of sorts, I get it. Talking to a picture or a tv set means mom has lost her grip on reality, so of course it makes you feel a bit uneasy. I listen to my mother carry on with her dementia ramblings and can hardly believe how far her mind has declined lately.
My mother refuses to even have a picture of my father in her room! She was married to him for 68 years and never utters his name. He died 6 years ago June 23rd. I truly wish she'd have a photo of him in her room and talk to it.....that would make me feel happy, like he was bringing her comfort. Try to look at it that way, that the photo of dad is bringing mom comfort, and be glad about it. That's my suggestion. Leave the photo alone and let her draw comfort from her husband's memory.
I would put more out. Get out the photo albums and share some memories perhaps I am just odd but I don't think talking to a picture is that weird. She just misses your dad.
I agree that it gives her comfort. Anything she does that doesn't agitate her or worsen her behavior or mood should be ok, no matter how unsettling it is for you to have to watch it. May you receive peace in your heart!
While on a train as a teenager, my friend & I saw an old lady travelling with a large teddy bear. She was well dressed, makeup, beads I think & a hat. *Best clothes*. Mr Bear was in a man's three piece suit & a hat, like a 1950's gentleman. She talked to him non-stop, describing the view, the stations, the people. Happy chatter.
A few people stared. Some smiled. Some said hello. Finally our curiosity got the better of us & we joined her & Mr Bear. She explained her husband had died & at first she was so very lonely. But now (insert the old man's name) went out like they used to. To the races, to the city. Sometimes she forgot where they were going or even once how to get home! But people were kind & always helped her. Sometimes they even bought her lunch when she lost her wallet (which she did alot). We wished her well as we got off the train.
We decided there was no harm in that. That the world is big enough to accommodate many sorts of people. Especially cheery ones.
Be glad she still seems to have some connection with your dad.
My mom forgot my dad within a couple of months of his death after 66 years of marriage and took up with an imaginary husband.
Now her dementia has progressed to a point where even the invisible husband isn't making appearances, and my brother and I said tonight that we wish he'd even show up to give her a modicum of happiness in her now-joyless existence.
My father died many years ago, long before my mom died. She would pick up his picture every night and tell him that she loved him and kiss him goodnight. I thought it was very sweet. She also had a picture of my deceased brother in her room and she found comfort looking at it and expressed her love to him.
Don’t be upset by your mom talking to his photo. If it brings her joy, allow her to speak.
No, do not remove the picture. Is mom distressed about the picture? Is there something else that concerns you about her talking with him? The picture is a sense of normalcy for mom and he could very easily be providing comfort.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
My mother refuses to even have a picture of my father in her room! She was married to him for 68 years and never utters his name. He died 6 years ago June 23rd. I truly wish she'd have a photo of him in her room and talk to it.....that would make me feel happy, like he was bringing her comfort. Try to look at it that way, that the photo of dad is bringing mom comfort, and be glad about it. That's my suggestion. Leave the photo alone and let her draw comfort from her husband's memory.
Wishing you all the best.
perhaps I am just odd but I don't think talking to a picture is that weird. She just misses your dad.
A few people stared. Some smiled. Some said hello. Finally our curiosity got the better of us & we joined her & Mr Bear. She explained her husband had died & at first she was so very lonely. But now (insert the old man's name) went out like they used to. To the races, to the city. Sometimes she forgot where they were going or even once how to get home! But people were kind & always helped her. Sometimes they even bought her lunch when she lost her wallet (which she did alot). We wished her well as we got off the train.
We decided there was no harm in that. That the world is big enough to accommodate many sorts of people. Especially cheery ones.
Go in peace 😇
My mom forgot my dad within a couple of months of his death after 66 years of marriage and took up with an imaginary husband.
Now her dementia has progressed to a point where even the invisible husband isn't making appearances, and my brother and I said tonight that we wish he'd even show up to give her a modicum of happiness in her now-joyless existence.
Don’t be upset by your mom talking to his photo. If it brings her joy, allow her to speak.
Wishing you and your family all the best.
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