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My father (87) constantly complains of one physical ailment or another. Leg pain, chest pain, dizziness, stomach ache, etc. All medical test show he is physically healthy for his age. He was diagnosed with dementia about 6 months ago. He has episodes of repeating questions, sleeps a lot, will not socialize with friends, very negative and needy.  Is the pain real in his mind or is it a tactic for attention?

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Mjs2699, was your Dad an illness complainer long before he had Dementia?  

Why I ask is my sig other would act like he's on death's door when he had a simple cold.... or if he had a head ache he thought it was a brain tumor.   Oh dear, having a hypochondriac in the house is difficult.   His grown daughter is the same way.   I use to be one, so I fully understand.
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Dear Mjs,

I know its hard to listen to all your dad's complaints. But I wonder if his medications are contributing to any of his symptoms. If possible maybe take him to another doctor for a second or even third opinion. I know its not easy getting older. And hard to know what is happening. Is he afraid of dying? Maybe try to get more friends or other family members to visit him. Or try to get him out more. I know us adult children end up being like Sherlock Holmes and its hard to know what to look for or where. I hope you can get to the bottom of your dad's feelings.
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This sounds like depression, which especially in men comes out as complaints of physical symptoms and maybe being hostile or angry instead of feeling sad.
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I don't know what it is. Some older people can be very uncomfortable, but suffer in silence. Others can be okay, but talk about how they hurt different places. That makes us feel like we should do something. We can end up running to the doctor with them several times a week, but the doctor doesn't find anything wrong. After a while we start to get immune to the complaints, but always worry what if something is wrong.

I had two parents with vascular dementia. One never complained, though I knew he was in a lot of pain. One complains all day, but the doctors say she is fine. All we can do is watch and use our best judgment about when they need to see the doctor.
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