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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
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by herself is this the first sign of midgrade dementia? Also she starts to do the blame game on my girlfriend oh btw I am 65 year old male, i live about 15 minutes away from my mom's care home where she is currently in independent living.
Ask the GF to let the suggestions, especially the tough ones, come from you. Better yet let the doctor be the heavy. Perhaps you could ask the doctor to put something in writing you could copy, frame and hang on the wall for mom to refer to. Whatever makes it easier for both you and GF to be innocent from the doctors decision. Learn therapeutic fibs to help mom accept. “For now we must follow docs orders. Doc will see how you do on the next test”.
How was she leaving by herself in the past? Going for a walk? Driving? With a group?
Take her a milkshake and give her a hug. These life passages are difficult for us all.
Garyjp, welcome to the forum. As yes, that memory test, hubby and I take them once a year. And some of the questions can be a challenge as you get older, like subtracting 7 starting with 93 (or whatever). Doing math in my head was never my thing.
I remember back when my Dad lived in Independent Living at a senior facility, and the Staff started to notice he was having memory problems, after testing first for a Urinary Tract Infection which can mimic dementia. Thus, the Staff called me in for a meeting to discuss moving my Dad to their Memory Care section, to which I agreed.
The move was easy for my Dad as he didn't mind moving from his nice apartment into a studio apartment in Memory Care. I told him it was cheaper (a therapeutic fib). I made sure his bedroom furniture was set up the same position that he had, that way when he awoke at night, everything was the same.
Yes, she needs a higher level of care like AL or MC. The "blame game" is just her increasing inability to use reason and logic and empathy anymore because dementia is robbing her of these skills. Also, memory impairment plus paranoia causes those with dementia to grasp at straws to explain things that happen to them.
it sounds like the doctor is saying she is not so independent any more. The usual, truly independent living in senior living involves being allowed to leave on your own, even have your car there if you are still d riving well etc.
Once one reaches an "assisted living" type of stage, that can be the level where leaving alone is no longer safe, or it could be as others are saying even "memory care" level. Where exactly people fit in depends to some degree on each facility and what they can handle at each level.
"Any score of 24 or more (out of 30) indicates a normal cognition. Below this, scores can indicate severe (≤9 points), moderate (10–18 points) or mild (19–23 points) cognitive impairment."
Your mother has Dementia and as such should not be in her own. So if she is in independent living, she needs to be in an AL.
JoAnn29, oh, with memory issues it is best to by-pass Assisted Living and go right into Memory Care. The Staff in Memory Care are familiar with the various stages of dementia, where in the Staff in Assisted Living are less familiar.
The doctor should have said, imo, mom has significant dementia now and needs to be living in Memory Care Assisted Living, not Independent Senior Living. A score of 13 on a cognition test means mom is pretty far into cognitive decline noe and unsafe to live with many things like stoves, cleaning supplies, even microwaves can become dangerous if she presses 60 minutes instead of 60 seconds or puts a fork in there! Please look into moving mom to where she'll be safe.
When my mother's MoCA score was 18, she lived in Assisted Living and was already losing pills and fouling up her meds to the point I had to get her on the med management program. And she was incontinent and being showered 2x a week by aides. She was in Memory Care by the time her score was down to 14.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Ask the GF to let the suggestions, especially the tough ones, come from you. Better yet let the doctor be the heavy. Perhaps you could ask the doctor to put something in writing you could copy, frame and hang on the wall for mom to refer to. Whatever makes it easier for both you and GF to be innocent from the doctors decision.
Learn therapeutic fibs to help mom accept. “For now we must follow docs orders. Doc will see how you do on the next test”.
How was she leaving by herself in the past? Going for a walk? Driving? With a group?
Take her a milkshake and give her a hug. These life passages are difficult for us all.
I remember back when my Dad lived in Independent Living at a senior facility, and the Staff started to notice he was having memory problems, after testing first for a Urinary Tract Infection which can mimic dementia. Thus, the Staff called me in for a meeting to discuss moving my Dad to their Memory Care section, to which I agreed.
The move was easy for my Dad as he didn't mind moving from his nice apartment into a studio apartment in Memory Care. I told him it was cheaper (a therapeutic fib). I made sure his bedroom furniture was set up the same position that he had, that way when he awoke at night, everything was the same.
Yes, she needs a higher level of care like AL or MC. The "blame game" is just her increasing inability to use reason and logic and empathy anymore because dementia is robbing her of these skills. Also, memory impairment plus paranoia causes those with dementia to grasp at straws to explain things that happen to them.
Once one reaches an "assisted living" type of stage, that can be the level where leaving alone is no longer safe, or it could be as others are saying even "memory care" level. Where exactly people fit in depends to some degree on each facility and what they can handle at each level.
Your mother has Dementia and as such should not be in her own. So if she is in independent living, she needs to be in an AL.
When my mother's MoCA score was 18, she lived in Assisted Living and was already losing pills and fouling up her meds to the point I had to get her on the med management program. And she was incontinent and being showered 2x a week by aides. She was in Memory Care by the time her score was down to 14.
Best of luck.